just thought I'd throw this out there for you to get a better understanding of my perspective on life and why I never fall into the trap of "Well, I didn't ask to be born, god damn it!"-----------------------------------------------------------
I've gone so much further than so many that I know and even further than So and So, and so... this life still calls on me to go further. And so I sometimes get indignant about it, and one day I called out to my God and said, "Motherfucker, why will you not relent?! I do this, that, and at least half of the other thing, and still you'll give me no peace! Meanwhile my brothers go about their lives with little more than utter carelessness, sometimes even less, and yet you seem to have given them a Get-Out-of-Jail-Free card! I stop to give thanks for blessings that they're not even aware of receiving and still I am beset on all sides by a struggle which ever vies for the better of me, my body and soul wrought with relentless challenges, while they stumble around utterly unscathed! Why hast thou forsaken me?"And in the kindest, most loving, infinitely gentle voice imaginable the reply came...
"Motherfucker, you asked for it."
"What?" I couldn't believe my ears.
"Yes, child. You dare to dream dreams that too many will never know, did not have the courage to choose. And I told you, before you were born, that you would come to doubt me. Don't you remember? Of course you don't, I told you that you wouldn't. I told you, while you begged me for the life that you now are living, that it wouldn't be as easy as you thought, to dream such beautiful dreams! But you wouldn't listen, and I love you for it. Ahhh, how you made me laugh with your brazen antics, thinking you'd swim through life as if it were the Dead Sea, eager to keep you afloat! You swore you'd never grow tired of it, secretly thinking that if by chance you did you'd simply lace your hands behind your head and float for a moment or four! And I insisted, 'Make no mistake, My Love, these dreams that you demand of me will demand much more of you.....' 'Yes, yes,' you interrupted, 'let's just get on with it, shall we? Lives are wasting! Hahaha!' And you laughed that especially contagious, beautifully irreverant, sublimely innocent, laughter (which, incidentally, I haven't heard from you for far too long) and we laughed and laughed together, rolling around the heavens, flooding the planets with our joyful tears while eons rolled by. And when our mirth receded in concert with the glaciers' retreat, you made me promise... really, you don't remember? You extracted a vow from me that no matter how hard it was for me, in all my all overly envied omnipotence, that I would wrap you in those special swaddling clothes, that shroud of unforeseeable circumstances, the one and only that would ensure the fruition of your most courageous, albeit, at times, seemingly masochistic, dreams. And now when I, rendered helpless by our pact, follow through as I swore I would, will you add to my torment by thinking that I have forgotten you? That I do not share in the suffering which I must unleash upon you? And do you think for one moment that you are the innocent victim of a sadistic plot that I have concocted as a consequence of my eternal boredom? It is you who have chosen to torment me! You have more choice than I, for you are free to do whatever you please and I am left filling in the blanks of your twisted Ad Libs life! I want nothing more for you than to see you fulfill the dreams that you made me believe in, such immaculate dreams that I, in all my glory, could never have conceived of, dreams that bring tears of rapture to my eyes even now when I think of them. And I swore to push you, to send cruel gale force winds toward you, and make the seas rise up in defiance of you if it were necessary to keep you on your path! And you should know, Child, that I add my tears, with a prayer and a kiss, to those storms whenever I am forced to send them crashing down upon you. Remember before you curse me, that it is you who have forced my hand. Know, too, that I love you without end, and I am forever grateful to you, for you have added to that which too many believe is untouchable and forever beyond them. Now go, and waste no more time thinking that you are some sort of helpless and abandoned pawn, a tiny ship tossed about by fickle fingered Fates. Only you have the freedom to be fickle. All the rest of Creation is bound by oaths made before words were even conceived, oaths made with boundless love for you and the faith that you would one day re-member us and free us from the unforgiving Forgetting Wind that now sweeps across the endless Plains of Time...."
+ Destroying Angel +
Showing posts with label Unsolicited Remarks. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Unsolicited Remarks. Show all posts
Saturday, February 14, 2009
Saturday, January 31, 2009
Opening thoughts
Hey everyone! Thanks for checking out the blog. I offer my greetings and prayers of thanksgiving to all that have made this dream possible. Max asked if I'd write from time to time since I've got a good deal of survival/tracking training as well as personal experience. I'm honored to do this and hope that it proves useful in some way.
I have long been praying to find others who'd be willing to embark on a journey like Reinvent09. Since finally joining facebook several months ago I've been trying to reach out to folks that are part of wilderness immersion programs, tracking schools, anarchist groups, etc. I hoped that I would find/create a group of like-hearted individuals that yearn, as I do, to reconnect with our ancestral selves, to know what it feels like to answer only to our truest needs and our simplest primitive desires, to set aside all the distractions and conflicting adjectives that cloud our minds and perceptions, thereby enabling us to hear the song of creation. This song alone can liberate us from the bonds of our tired, tomb-like cocoons, into the splendor of our authentic selves and the uniquely perfect dance of freedom that is both our heritage and our birthright!
I've been making lots of wondeful new friends in my journey, many of whom share a similar vision. There has been no one, however, that is willing to entertain the notion of really living this vision. Don't get me wrong, there's an army of awesome individuals out there doing really great and inspiring work, and they're devoting their lives to it. It's just that everyone seems (i.e. I may be wrong) content to try and change the system from within. To run schools and programs that take people out of their normal realm of thinking and acting, to empower them with some self-reliance skills and arm them with some ancient ancestral wisdom.... only then to send them back to their normal lives of competition and consumerism. I understand that lives are changed in the process, and a person's level of competitiveness and consumerism is lessened by these experiences, and that's all very good and important stuff. I'm just not convinced that it's going to save us from the storm that's brewing on the horizon.
I often look at it like this... few people would disagree that we, as a species, have strayed at least a little from the path of being good stewards of this planet and all its inhabitants. Few would disagree that that is the path we were once on and ultimately should get back on. So when someone's hiking in the woods and they stop and realize that they've gotten all caught up in their thoughts and failed to notice that they're no longer on the trail to wherever they were going, what options do they have? Assuming they still want to get where they were going, they can either back track to the point where they stepped off the trail, or they can change course and try to intercept their trail somewhere near where they would have been had they remained on course. Well I personally don't see anything wrong with backtracking, going back to how we used to live when were were not yet a blight on this beautiful planet. Most people are so caught up in the web of progress, however, that this idea is utterly abhorrent to them. That would be a total admission of guilt or stupidity or something else that they're equally unwilling to come to terms with in themselves. Fine, so let's take the other option and strike off into the untamed wilderness that lies between the here and there, and we'll bring with us what we need or otherwise feel we absolutely can't live without, and we'll see if we can't someday make our way back to that yellow brick road. Sounds good to me, however most people are nearly as reluctanct to pursue this option for the simple fact that you can't take as much shit with you when you're bushwacking as you can when you're on a trail..... "What do you mean, I can't take my blow dryer and my crystal martini glasses?! Fuck it then! Fire up the bulldozers and we'll make a new path to the promised land! And while you're at it, fire up the blenders, too. Might as well have a drink while we're improving upon nature's perfection, right?"
Well, it's usually agood time for me to get off my soap-box once the expletives start flying around. I don't know any of you and don't want to piss in yer shoes on our first date, hahahaha.
Best wishes,
Destroying Angel
I have long been praying to find others who'd be willing to embark on a journey like Reinvent09. Since finally joining facebook several months ago I've been trying to reach out to folks that are part of wilderness immersion programs, tracking schools, anarchist groups, etc. I hoped that I would find/create a group of like-hearted individuals that yearn, as I do, to reconnect with our ancestral selves, to know what it feels like to answer only to our truest needs and our simplest primitive desires, to set aside all the distractions and conflicting adjectives that cloud our minds and perceptions, thereby enabling us to hear the song of creation. This song alone can liberate us from the bonds of our tired, tomb-like cocoons, into the splendor of our authentic selves and the uniquely perfect dance of freedom that is both our heritage and our birthright!
I've been making lots of wondeful new friends in my journey, many of whom share a similar vision. There has been no one, however, that is willing to entertain the notion of really living this vision. Don't get me wrong, there's an army of awesome individuals out there doing really great and inspiring work, and they're devoting their lives to it. It's just that everyone seems (i.e. I may be wrong) content to try and change the system from within. To run schools and programs that take people out of their normal realm of thinking and acting, to empower them with some self-reliance skills and arm them with some ancient ancestral wisdom.... only then to send them back to their normal lives of competition and consumerism. I understand that lives are changed in the process, and a person's level of competitiveness and consumerism is lessened by these experiences, and that's all very good and important stuff. I'm just not convinced that it's going to save us from the storm that's brewing on the horizon.
I often look at it like this... few people would disagree that we, as a species, have strayed at least a little from the path of being good stewards of this planet and all its inhabitants. Few would disagree that that is the path we were once on and ultimately should get back on. So when someone's hiking in the woods and they stop and realize that they've gotten all caught up in their thoughts and failed to notice that they're no longer on the trail to wherever they were going, what options do they have? Assuming they still want to get where they were going, they can either back track to the point where they stepped off the trail, or they can change course and try to intercept their trail somewhere near where they would have been had they remained on course. Well I personally don't see anything wrong with backtracking, going back to how we used to live when were were not yet a blight on this beautiful planet. Most people are so caught up in the web of progress, however, that this idea is utterly abhorrent to them. That would be a total admission of guilt or stupidity or something else that they're equally unwilling to come to terms with in themselves. Fine, so let's take the other option and strike off into the untamed wilderness that lies between the here and there, and we'll bring with us what we need or otherwise feel we absolutely can't live without, and we'll see if we can't someday make our way back to that yellow brick road. Sounds good to me, however most people are nearly as reluctanct to pursue this option for the simple fact that you can't take as much shit with you when you're bushwacking as you can when you're on a trail..... "What do you mean, I can't take my blow dryer and my crystal martini glasses?! Fuck it then! Fire up the bulldozers and we'll make a new path to the promised land! And while you're at it, fire up the blenders, too. Might as well have a drink while we're improving upon nature's perfection, right?"
Well, it's usually agood time for me to get off my soap-box once the expletives start flying around. I don't know any of you and don't want to piss in yer shoes on our first date, hahahaha.
Best wishes,
Destroying Angel
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